Come With Us Podcast

Unleashing Your Kink: Introducing FemDom, Navigating Support, and Mastering Communication in BDSM

January 10, 2024 Beth Liebling Episode 160
Come With Us Podcast
Unleashing Your Kink: Introducing FemDom, Navigating Support, and Mastering Communication in BDSM
Show Notes Transcript Chapter Markers

Ever find yourself sweating at the thought of sharing your deepest, kinkiest desires with your significant other? Fear not, my fellow explorers of the risqué, because this episode of Come With Us is here to navigate the choppy waters of BDSM revelation with none other than Dara from the Pink Kink Podcast. Together, we're demystifying the intricate dance of introducing FemDom to your partner, sharing the ins and outs of how to approach it with both sensitivity and a dash of daring. Buckle up for a journey through the listener emails that echo your own curiosities, where we strip down the taboos and build up the courage for those tantalizing heart-to-hearts.

This episode is the confessional and the strategy session you never knew you needed. Aaron and Dara talk about how our partners become the cheerleaders in our kinkier pursuits—even when they're cheering from the sidelines. It's an honest look at the diverse roles our loved ones play in fostering our erotic explorations, and a guide to nurturing those relationships with the same fervor we approach a steamy session.

Capping off our adventure into the erotic arts, let's not forget the cornerstone of any spicy encounter: communication. Not just your garden-variety chat, but the nitty-gritty on safe words, nonverbal cues, and the occasional interruption by our furry friends. Prepare to chuckle as we recount Daddy J's interrupted gaming sessions and debate the merits of a squeaky toy in more ways than one. It's all about ensuring everyone's on board and feeling safe, because when it comes to the bedroom—or the dungeon—it's not just about the whips and chains, it's about the bonds of trust that make it all worthwhile.

Make sure you check out Dara on the Pink Kink Podcast!

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Speaker 1:

Are you saying you faked with me?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I just can't say it and it says so cool, I'm not wrong.

Speaker 3:

Now you're single.

Speaker 2:

What do you know about sexual relations?

Speaker 1:

Is it true that if you don't use it, you're going to use it?

Speaker 2:

I'm a little worried about being a slut. You're listening to the Come With Us podcast Talking the good, the kinky and the ugly. Here are your hosts, beth and Erin.

Speaker 3:

Hey there, all you holes and polls and welcome to another episode of Come With Us podcast. I am Erin in for Beth again. No, beth, I know some of you were hoping that she was going to be back right at the start of the new year. She actually came down with some type of cold or sickness the last couple weeks so she's had no voice. So you can't really record a podcast without a voice. So we're hoping she gets better physically and, of course, mentally as she grieves the loss of her daughter. But you've got me again this week, and this week actually we've got another guest, one that you know sparked some feedback and a lot of excitement and she was a lot of fun when we had her on what A couple years ago. It is Dara from the kink pink podcast, pink kink. Did I? Did I say that right? I'm just going to ask you.

Speaker 1:

It's a pink kink yeah.

Speaker 3:

Pink kink. Yeah, but my, my mouth said kink pink, right. It's okay, from the pink kink podcast, so check them out. Dara and Ra Ra do an awesome show. They've actually just launched a new educational series. I guess we'll call it. We'll get into that a little bit later, but yeah, it's been what? Three years, I think we were saying.

Speaker 1:

Since you've been on something like two years, maybe even three. Yeah, cause pink kink has been around for three years. We're coming up on our three year anniversary. So yeah, maybe, cause I think we did our episode right around the beginning of when pink kink started.

Speaker 3:

Okay, so yeah, it's. Oh man, we've been so much has changed.

Speaker 2:

Yes, we're talking about that off the year.

Speaker 3:

Of course, tina left the show for, you know, personal reasons, stuff like that. Beth has been out for a while, but I wanted to get you on because we had a couple of listener emails that I thought went along with what you know, what we talked about last time and your, your dom or femdom kind of personality. And then, like I said, you guys have launched a new class or educational setup from pink kink, so we'll talk about that too. So what I wanted to say is we'll start with the very first email that we got, that when I read it I was like, oh, I know one person I want to talk to about this. Actually, I knew, I knew to a friend of ours who's been on several times, vivian Rose, who is a SSBBW face sitting model. Like extraordinary, she's traveling hell of an acronym.

Speaker 3:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

It's a what. What does that stand for?

Speaker 3:

Oh, hold on, Uh-oh, as I'm Googling this on my laptop and the government's probably watching me. That's fine. It's super-sized, big beautiful woman. So, I think Vivian has a like 85 inch around ass is what her like big claim is Okay.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, tell her, I want to bite it.

Speaker 3:

Okay, I will get in touch with her and let you know, because I text with her from time to time when.

Speaker 1:

I really love big ass on a woman and I just go, I'm okay.

Speaker 3:

So I need to have both of y'all on together, preferably in the same room. So we'll have to make that work at some point in time.

Speaker 1:

Oh, that'd be fun.

Speaker 3:

But yeah, so she does like face sitting and stuff like that, but you also have more of the dominant thing where she is. Just you know she guys like to be squashed by her and her very large assets. But, like I said, if you ever want to email us, you have a question, you have a comment, you have a topic you want us to get into, feel free, I won't read your name and let anybody know who you are unless you explicitly tell us to. But come with us confessions at gmailcom. That's, come with us confessions at gmailcom.

Speaker 3:

But listener Sean, who told me I could use his name. So I'm wondering if he's actually have a theory on why he told me I could use his name. But we'll get into that in a second. He said my wife and I have been reading a lot of Femme Dom Erotica and he wanted to figure out how, like they read it together. They you know that gets them both in the mood and then they go and play, but they're not playing from the Femme like the dominant, submissive standpoint. So he was basically his question was after I read, you know, through all of it to try to summarize, how does he then start pushing his wife or kind of nudging his wife to go hey, you're turning, you want to read about this stuff? How do we start moving into it?

Speaker 1:

So the question is how do I get my wife to do Femme Dom in the bedroom?

Speaker 3:

Yeah, basically. Yeah, like he said, he know, like he understands that it turns her on to read about it. Yes, he just doesn't know what. At which point it becomes like a okay, let's act it out or let's, you know, start branching into this. Or is it something that he just lets her read about and be a fantasy in her brain and let it go?

Speaker 1:

Well, first rule of BDSM and kink in general is communication, communication, communication. I appreciate that.

Speaker 3:

Well, first rule of all relationships First rule of anything, really yeah yeah, communication is like. Every listener who's listening right now has listened to any episode knows that I yell about it almost every week, yeah, so we have pink kink.

Speaker 1:

Every single episode is like please talk to your partner. Yeah, like this. We did a Reddit episode a couple of days ago. We recorded and I think it's going to be released relatively soon I want to say it's next week but every single one could have just been answered like with communicate with your partner, tell them Exactly Now. I personally really need to start living what I preach, because I can't do that either.

Speaker 3:

I mean, it's difficult because, like and depending on where you are in your relationship and I've said this before, you know like I'm married I've been married almost 10 years Like I've known my wife since I was a child.

Speaker 1:

But even though you know you're going into panga kind of yeah, Only they actually dated.

Speaker 3:

We didn't date until college. I had a crush on her and then didn't work. And then she finally had a crush on me and did worry yeah, it was a.

Speaker 3:

it was a very long long time of will, they won't, they kind of thing. But she knows me better than anybody in the world. But there's still stuff like, especially like sexual desires sometimes, where like I'll have a fantasy for something and the thought of just like throwing it out. There is kind of like standing out in the street corner waiting for a bus, naked, where you're like I don't want to be this exposed. I just kind of want to, you know, hold on to it for myself.

Speaker 1:

Because it's a huge fear of rejection. It's the fear of your partner not accepting that about you and then losing your partner over it is the greatest fear, right, yeah.

Speaker 3:

Or them just laughing at you and telling, or looking at you like you're weird or you know right disgusting to them, or anything like that which is.

Speaker 1:

I literally actually had that experience with my ex husband.

Speaker 3:

Okay, not the current one, Not the current one.

Speaker 1:

He's amazing. That's daddy.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, we talked about him last time about how supportive and amazing he is.

Speaker 1:

Oh, he still is. Oh yeah, I know.

Speaker 3:

I'm not saying he isn't, I know I know, I know, but the the other one.

Speaker 1:

Actually we were literally in therapy, like in couples counseling, trying to save this shit and I'm a little. So I do the femdom thing, I do the electro thing, I am also a little, and I was discovering that side of me at that time and he actually said in counseling that he finds that side of me disgusting.

Speaker 2:

Wow.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, that's like a brutal honesty that I didn't think.

Speaker 1:

I didn't think he had it in him either. He, he was not that kind of person to be that brutally honest, but he said it and there was no taking that back.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, that's, and that's something weird because I'm I'm much more of a like. I don't want to hurt the people around me.

Speaker 3:

Some people like some random dude who you know, looks at me like in the store and goes, hey man, what do you think of this shirt? I'll be like dude, you look weird, don't buy that shirt. That's just an example. That's never happened to me, but I don't care if I heard his feelings. If he goes, oh, really, like sure, I'm like, okay, well, cool, why'd you ask my opinion? Right, but my wife or anybody close to me, if they were to ask, like especially my wife, that intimacy that we share, I wouldn't want to, you know, make her feel disgusting or make her feel like you know, like I'm not gonna do that, I'm gonna do something, or make her feel like she is, there's something wrong with her, or anything like that. I couldn't imagine what she brought to the table Like we. She knows that I'm probably the freak year one out of the two of us, but even if she brought something weird to me that has never crossed my mind or anything like that, I still wouldn't do it that way.

Speaker 3:

I feel like I mean, I've never been presented with it, so I don't know.

Speaker 1:

It was pretty traumatic, yeah, which is the reason I went daddy hunting and I found somebody. I was like look here's, here's what's happening. I want to be this little per. You know that I have discovered about myself. I need somebody who can handle it.

Speaker 3:

So real quick. Why don't you explain the little factor real quick?

Speaker 1:

Well, you can always go back and listen to the previous episode that I recorded about being a little like a 30 second little side.

Speaker 3:

There's the bratty side.

Speaker 1:

Well, he just recently discovered that too. I so a little is somebody who kind of it's it's sort of age regression, but that's more like the therapy, like, you know, you go back. It's somebody who acts younger than they are. There's ABDL, which is adult baby diaper lover. There's the little which we've sort of narrowed down to being between the ages of two, which is where the adult baby part ends and kind of a tween situation. So like puberty hits and you become a middle. Middle is, you know, your teenager I've never heard of before.

Speaker 1:

I've heard the little part, but Well, we've been going down the rabbit hole with that, because Rara has fully embraced her middle side. I have fully embraced my little side and Rara has been playing with the idea of doing the baby stuff too, which I won't touch because bodily fluids, I can't deal with it.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

It's a straight up phobia. I cannot do it, so that's a no for me. But she likes the idea of experimenting with stuff, so it's like, okay, cool, you do you.

Speaker 3:

Your next podcast. Like y'all can do a spin off of pink kink and call it the middle and the little. It sounds like a sitcom from the nineties.

Speaker 1:

Well, okay, so God, we're going off on so many tansy, sorry, okay, so really quick. My age range, for little, is between the ages of three and six.

Speaker 3:

Okay.

Speaker 1:

So I'm old enough to be potty trained, but I am not old enough to cross the street by myself.

Speaker 3:

Okay.

Speaker 1:

Did I ever tell you how pink kink actually got started?

Speaker 3:

No, I would love to hear it.

Speaker 1:

We were in a different podcasts discord and they would have you know we would happen to voice chat and everything and we'd have fun with everybody. And somebody commented gee, this is like the Dara and Ra Ra show. This is what this is coming across at. And Ra-Ra went huh, she's always wanted to do a podcast. She absolutely wanted to do one on Kink in general, because she had never heard a podcast that wasn't just strictly DS. Anything that was Kink related was almost entirely DS.

Speaker 1:

And she wanted to do one that was just all about different kinks and she was like well, hey, dara, we already kind of do a show. You wanna do this with me? I'm like, yeah, why the fuck not? I'm bored, it's COVID.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

And then explosion.

Speaker 3:

Well, we started this because Beth used to have a radio show at the radio station I worked at here in Houston, and then she stopped that because she got busy with the shop that she owned.

Speaker 3:

And my wife and I were in there one time hanging out because she and my wife are friends I mean, beth and I are friends too but when my wife met her, my wife fell in love with her and so we were hanging out and I had said something about her bringing back the radio show, and then my wife just chimed in and said well, hey, you're an audio engineer, you have all this equipment at the house. Why don't you guys do a podcast together? And Beth and I looked at each other and said that could be fun. But then we had to both stare at my wife and go are you sure you're okay with this this seems like it would be out of your comfort zone to me and go have these sexually intimate conversations with others, not to mention like there are times where I reference certain aspects of my married life and our sex life and stuff like that. And she was like I will never listen to it. I don't wanna know who listens to it. Just don't keep me in the dark about it. So she, it's very.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, but and see, daddy J is just the opposite. He's like oh my God, send me the link to that. Or like when I'm editing, it'll be blasting through the house, because I don't bother wearing my headphones when I'm editing and I probably should, cause the audio quality would be better through the headphones instead of my speakers. But whatever and he'll, I'll start cracking up about something and he'll be like what happened and so I'll replay it, and then he starts cracking up about it. So we have a good time with that.

Speaker 3:

See, yeah, we both have partners that are two different types of supportive. Like my wife does it like, cause I've talked to her about hey, like when I've gotten overloaded at work with a million things going on, I've like, man, I just I don't know if I have it in me today and she's always the one who, like, encourages me. He's like no, you're having fun with it, it's good for you. Like you're enjoying what you're doing and you're bringing like new stuff to the table. Cause eventually, like every now and then, some sponsor or potential sponsor will like listen and be like oh, hey, you want to try out this new sex toy for me and Beth and I will both get a copy of it and start playing with it and it's, it's interesting.

Speaker 2:

It's fun.

Speaker 3:

Cause it helps and it also helps my wife and I explore. It's just me talking, I guess, to the general public is the part cause we've listened to podcasts about, you know, relationships and sex and stuff like that before, even when we were dating or engaged and stuff like that. But I guess it's just me talking to the general public, her being a potential topic of conversation which makes her go. No, I don't need to know about it.

Speaker 1:

It's been really cute. When we go to our local dungeon, like Crucible in DC, daddy J is there and people. We actually had the hugest birthday party there in September. It was mine and Raura's birthday party, so we did a pink, pink takeover and, geez, there was almost 300 people there. I mean it was bad shit. I know it was insane and we both did scenes that were like extreme for us. So we had a really good time with that. But there were people there that had never met us in person. They came because pink kink and they saw Daddy J and they were like, oh my God, are you Daddy J? And he's like, yes, that's me. And they were like, oh my God, it's like he didn't know what to do with it. It was really funny, cause I share everything, like I don't hold back. Did we ever answer the?

Speaker 3:

question. We did not. I was getting get back to here in just a second.

Speaker 1:

I just realized that.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, breaking. So why? Okay, let's recap real quick. Wife loves reading, femme D'Amiratica loves the idea of it gets returned on. Doesn't husband doesn't know how to bring her into it and start actually doing it in the bedroom or closet or kitchen or dungeon or wherever the hell you want to do it Wherever the fuck you want.

Speaker 1:

Honestly, like we said, the very first thing is always going to be communication, so what I would recommend is list out what you want, cause it could be literally anything. What does he want her to do specifically? Does he want humiliation? Does he want sophistication? Does he want CBT? What do you want her to actually do? Oh, you just realized what CBT was.

Speaker 3:

No, I know what it is, yeah, and if you're watching on YouTube, you can see Dara and her super fiery wig today. But, yeah, I just got a big shutter and I've done it before too, because we've had like a Vivian. So she does face sitting stuff. But she also works with another model named Amazon Amanda, who that her like, one of her specialties is CBT, which guys cover your ears or listen gently cock and ball torture. And the second, like she said it years ago when we had her on, we had Vivian on. She talked about it, about Amanda doing it, and it just like nope, sends a shutter through my spine. Nope, nope. Those things are meant to be treated with care and loving this on me.

Speaker 1:

Well, rara agrees with you. She says, no, I want to be nice to the dick, we'd be nice, and it is nice back and I'm like, no, I'm gonna play Bop it.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, no, I see we need to have Rara on because she and I, she and I see more eye to eye on some stuff. And then there's some stuff that I've heard you guys talk about. I'm like nope, not me.

Speaker 1:

How are you with blood needles? No see there is me see she for her birthday. Her scene was to put candles with ribbons and happy birthday Like on needle candles on needles in her ass and then light them on fire.

Speaker 3:

No, no, no, no, no, and then everybody's happy birthday and I blew the candles out.

Speaker 1:

Oh, no, no, no she turned her ass into a birthday cake.

Speaker 3:

And I think last time you were on I don't know if we talked about it on air, but y'all had a picture, I think, on At some point on social and it was somebody who had like sewn up somebody's back, like Like just through the thin layer skin on top, and Beth sent it to me one time and I Almost threw up and I texted her back and I was like, like I was like dead serious, you send me something like that again, I will delete your phone, I will block you, I will never talk to you again.

Speaker 1:

So she's like, whoa, that's a hard limit and I was like, yes, we should not tell you about the butterfly.

Speaker 3:

Nope, nope.

Speaker 1:

Okay.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, nope.

Speaker 1:

I don't do mm-hmm.

Speaker 3:

And I see I don't. I'm not scared of needles, you know Watched when they give me an IV or when I get blood drawn I'm like, yeah, just do it, I don't care. But the mm-hmm.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I actually am terrified of needles, I am terrified of blood, which you know, because I'm terrified of it.

Speaker 3:

I just it's not. It not for me.

Speaker 1:

It's part of the it's part of the phobia, like the bodily fluids phobia, like I can't deal with it. So, and then for my scene, I did a sploshing scene. I was also turned into a cake, so Splashing is food, play, where you like, squish food. And so I was in a different room. I had about 20 people that I had on a list, a named list, and they were. They squeezed icing and sprinkles all over my body. The only thing I was wearing was underwear and and all over my body and they all they licked it off. Okay, so each of the 20 people got two licks Because I was turning 40, so I got 40 licks interesting.

Speaker 3:

I mean I Was gonna make a joke there, but then it just like flew out of my head, which is good, because it probably wasn't a good joke anyway, but that's yeah, geez you wanted to know what we've been up to. I mean, yeah, I did, I asked and that's that's interesting. That was more up my alley than any needles or blood or like specific pain other than spanking.

Speaker 1:

Well, tell you what if you're ever in the area and you want to come join us, you can put some icing on me and and lick or whatever it is, that's gonna be a hard limit for my wife.

Speaker 3:

So arm. Yeah, I Don't. I think that's still be weird.

Speaker 1:

I had two co-workers that came to the party that are also kinky and I Said the limit for me is you can. You can be in the room, you can give me a lick, but you cannot lick my tits. So, instead, one of them, who is very gay, saw icing on daddy Jay's face and daddy Jay went well, why don't you get it off of me? And so my incredibly gay, flamboyant in drag co-worker went and licked my husband's face.

Speaker 3:

See, I don't want anybody licking my face, see there, there's just certain things that like, when you guys talk about it, or when you talk about it like I'm like, yeah, I'm kind of, I'm kind of weird, I like a lot of. I've got a big variety of probably what I like, because my rule has always been Most things, I will always try like I'll at least go into it with an open mind and needles and blood being not Everybody's allowed a limit, but you're allowed to have your limits then you say stuff like that.

Speaker 3:

I'm like I don't want anybody to lick my face ever. That's weird like my dog, but that's because she's a dog.

Speaker 1:

Oh, my dog likes to French, I'm not.

Speaker 3:

No, my dog doesn't go near my, my mouth or anything like that, but eventually, like I have to, lose my face so that she licks my chin instead.

Speaker 1:

She's a definite face licker and we cannot break her of this habit. And but she's really, really cute. So, like you, almost don't want to yeah, okay, so back to Communicate.

Speaker 3:

Write down a list of things that you want write down what is exactly that you want.

Speaker 1:

What is it in these stories that you want to experience and have her do the same? Is there anything in these stories that you think would be super fun to actually do? I will do them, let's do it. So we then, you like, both look at your list and see if there's anything you have in common and then say this one Would it be cool if you know, this weekend, whatever we tried this just a smidge Just to see what will happen. But I think, since we both are turned on by this, let's try it. Let's just make an evening of it and see what happens. It'll be super fun.

Speaker 3:

I Fair enough, I like it. That's a much more simple answer than I would have given. I would have what's yours? Oh my God, I probably would have just rambled on for an hour of you know. Hey, well, you know, first you want to talk to her and then you want to. You know, keep reading together and then trying to act it out while you're reading. That sounds complicated and just.

Speaker 1:

No, I don't think I wouldn't do that, because you know, the other basic thing is consent. So if you just try to do this without saying, hey, I'm going to do this, that's not getting active consent. Yeah, by making the list and by saying, oh, this is the one we have in common, this is the one we both like, let's hey, how do you feel about doing this together? That is. And then she goes oh, yeah, I think I would like to try that one. That sounds cool. That is actually getting active consent. Fair enough, yeah, and then from there you do your negotiation. What are the parameters that we are going to have in this scene? I want to try CBT. She wants to try CBT. What are the parameters? Is it just going to be like a little squeezy squeeze? Is it going to be like a slap? Is it going to be full on puppet? How are we doing this? I love doing this to you.

Speaker 3:

It is so much fun, I know you do, and it's funny because we've never actually met like in person, we've just talked like via this and email and stuff like that. But it's the chemistry of that. You like to just like pick at me and do stuff like this is interesting.

Speaker 1:

It's fun, it's really fun. I know you're having a lot. You are definitely one of those people that I want to see what I can push you to, but right now I'm just having a great fun broadening out and teasing you. Your reactions are fantastic.

Speaker 3:

Thank you, it's not like I'm acting. It makes my junk just go. Nope, stop it.

Speaker 1:

Stop. It's just kind of what I like, so it works.

Speaker 3:

We had another email that I wanted to bring up because it's something that, like I said, we could have had Vivian on to talk about it, but she's more of just the face smashing with her ass, kind of thing. But another guy, who did not tell me I could use his name, so I'm not going to, but he's having trouble convincing his girlfriend, which I've seen this a lot on social media too. Well, reddit, basically, oh God, reddit. His girlfriend is very voluptuous and doesn't believe that he wants her to smother him with either her boobs or her ass sometime, you know, like alternating between the two.

Speaker 1:

Now I see why you wanted me to answer this question. I do Because I threatened you last time you did that. Stuck with you, didn't it?

Speaker 3:

It did, and I don't even remember what we were talking about. I just remember you threatening me with it and I was like that sounds interesting. But then we got the email about it and I was like, well, I know somebody who was threatening me to smash me with her boobs or smother me, so sure, why not, let's ask that question.

Speaker 1:

So the best funniest thing about that is that is Daddy J's favorite thing.

Speaker 3:

Which part.

Speaker 1:

Being smashed in the head with my tits.

Speaker 3:

Okay.

Speaker 1:

He, like I, will do it while he's gaming just to see what'll happen and he'll die, and it's hilarious. And then his entire team dies and he's like, has to get on the mic. I I'm sorry, something happened.

Speaker 3:

Does he tell them what happened, or is he just saying no?

Speaker 1:

No, not really, because we don't really know all the ages of all the people in there, I guess. But like it's, I will go up and every single morning I'll like slap him with a tit on his head and he's like huh.

Speaker 3:

So that's what I was going to ask Like like when you smash, like when you say smash, like are you talking? Like between your two boobs? You're just like like headphones.

Speaker 1:

No, dude, they're huge. I can literally lift up a tit and hit you across the face with it.

Speaker 3:

Okay, that's something I did not know.

Speaker 1:

Because you're not actually seeing my boobs angle, but like when I tell you, when I tell you they're huge, if they're not constrained in a bra, I can pick up a tit and go bam.

Speaker 3:

Okay, that's, that's an interesting visualization, I guess. And I've never met, I've never met Daddy J, but now that when I do meet him, I'm going to go, oh okay, so I know exactly how you like to start your morning every morning, A couple of coffee, Two of them.

Speaker 1:

put your face in between them and go did it, did it, did it, did it, did it, did it, did it, did it, did it. Like I'm boxing Okay.

Speaker 3:

Interesting. I mean that it sounds interesting. Might be something I have to write down and take to my wife and go. Hey, by the way. So, yeah, he wants his girlfriend to do that kind of stuff, or, you know, smash his face with her ass and stuff like that.

Speaker 3:

But, she won't believe him because she's, and I've seen it again. Like I said, I've seen this on on Reddit and social media before is women going oh no, he'll like. What if I hurt him? Or what if I'm too heavy? Or what if you know he doesn't like it? Or what if like? What if he makes me feel like I don't know she's too heavy? Or what if he dies? And the guy's response always is if I die, I die with a smile on my face, which yeah, well, clearly it's a fetish for them.

Speaker 3:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

Clearly they're going to be okay with it. But again, communication, this is what safe words are for. I don't. I don't understand. Like, seriously, like and even okay. So in the case of the face sitting you can't actually say anything. No, words are not going to be readily available. So in this case you can either do a kind of noise or an. That's what I do to my dogs and you know they understand. So I'm sure a human could. So I know you can do you can, he can literally tap her ass.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, because we maybe and I have talked I don't know if we've talked about our on air, just, you know, in past, like having conversations together, is, I think, the guys that she sessions for there's like a pinching, like a certain number of pinches, that let her know? Like hey, like that's beyond the limit of what I'm willing to accept, kind of thing?

Speaker 1:

That's literally called a nonverbal safe word there you go.

Speaker 1:

If, if so, when I little, when I get really really deep into little space, I forget words. I actually do go nonverbal. So we have to have a nonverbal safe word. And usually it's just me doing, you know, grabby hands, because that's the only thing I can think of to do. And there's like I, I don't use for me personally. I don't use the color system when I'm topping, yes, but when I'm very, very deep into whatever, because Daddy J also likes to do forced orgasms when we do that, I forget words.

Speaker 1:

I have no idea what's happening. At that point I forget I'm human and I forget to breathe. So the only thing I can remember is okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, and that means that means stop, because I literally cannot remember anything else other than that, see, only thing that can come out of my mouth. So what you do in that situation is figure out what the person who is being smothered or can go nonverbal, what can they do, what can they access. They still have use of their hands tap out, pinch, poke something.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, see, that's why I like I like the tap out method as a not that I've done it, but like the tap out method is something that has become part of the vernacular over the last 20-25 years with the popularity of USC is. I mean it's, it's part of the, the lingo that people use is, you know, like, yeah, I'd love to stay up and, you know, keep chatting all night at this house party, but I'm tapping out, I'm going right every day.

Speaker 1:

I know that there's also. You can hold a squeaky toy in your hand and squeeze that Like the hand clenching motion.

Speaker 3:

Just one squeeze is all it takes you have to make sure you lock the dog outside the room.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, that is. You should probably do that anyway.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, because I agree there's some people who just kind of you know, I'd like the dog doesn't go anywhere near them.

Speaker 1:

the dog wants to watch, and then I feel judged and I Don't. I don't want to be lacking in any way.

Speaker 3:

I you know and see this is this is an interesting thing, because I've never, I've never thought of this, I've never played like that, but like dogs are really protective. Mm-hmm and I feel like if there were like a certain scene that like you were playing and you cried out in pain, that the dog would then feel like, oh shit, I've got to protect my mom and they would try to disembowel the, the person doing it.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, yeah, that's that's another good reason to lock the dog out of the room when you play.

Speaker 3:

That's a version of sexy play that I've never thought of like having a dog, like about having a dog or anything like that Is because it would probably not end well.

Speaker 1:

No, no, interesting, all right Well but we so Daddy Jay and I do a lot of little and daddy is referred to as I just call him, daddy Jay and and it's really kind of cute because I can get away with it because of the dogs when my parents are over- I Can say to the dog go give this to Daddy, because they think I'm just, you know, here's like you do with a little kid, daddy.

Speaker 1:

I mean you refer to them like that I can do this. But really I'm saying, oh look, daddy is over there. Yeah, daddy, can you give me this? But they think I'm talking to the dogs.

Speaker 3:

I Mean, yeah, that's, that's a good way to get away with it. I get away with a lot. Yeah, I can tell. All right, so I Think we're running out of time right now. Do you have time to stay on for one more episode and we'll talk about this electro play Class as you started.

Speaker 1:

sure, absolutely, we can do that. We just went on an absolute ramble.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, that's usually what I do.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I have.

Speaker 3:

Conversational ADD, especially in a broadcasting mode, because, ran, I have lived through a lot and I remember almost every experience I've ever had or read or anything like that. Weirdly enough, it's why part of the reason I was told to go into radio to begin with. So, yeah, I've always got some type of weird memory or weird story or weird fact that I know that somebody says something I'm like oh, by the way, we're gonna go five miles down the road on tangent.

Speaker 1:

Our best episodes of pink kink are when we forget what we were actually talking about and just go off on Tangents and we make shit up and we crack up and we're just hysterical laughing and then we have to come back. We're like, I think, one one of our episodes that we did. We talked about the actual topic For a grand total of six minutes. There you go, I mean.

Speaker 3:

You'll make it feel like like the listener is sitting right next to you guys on a couch, like, oh you, yeah, it feels like they're. They're there, like it's just. And I did a radio show where that was. Our goal is Three guys sitting at a bar just talking about anything that comes on a guy, like it was a sports radio show. But the goal was, if you're sitting at a bar and there's one guy who will only ever talk about sports, he is boring and you don't want to sit next to him and there's a guy who can go oh hey, look, baseball, five minutes about baseball.

Speaker 3:

Oh hey, by the way, did you watch Game of Thrones? Let's talk 10 minutes about that. Oh hey, let's talk about boobs or barbecue or beer, or whatever. So it was. It was just guys, cover all the bees. Um, and that was the goal is to be, you know, the. We wanted the listener to think that, hey, we're all just sitting at a bar hanging out Like we want you to be involved, we want you to feel like you're, and you guys do a really good job of that too.

Speaker 1:

When you have a conversation. It feels like I'm in the conversation, like I'm observing and I can talk on my own, but I feel like I think my favorite part is having inside jokes with the listeners that we get to bring up like a hundred episodes later and people still get it.

Speaker 3:

That's fun, having worked in radio and sports radio for a long time. There's a guy named Jim Rome who's been doing it for forever. One of the very first most famous sports talk Hosts and all of his inside jokes what he does is like when they come up, he's really good at like Reminding the listener or reminding a new listener of like hey, you know, dan and Saskatchewan said this and He'll react to like the comment or the joke or whatever. But then he'll also like bring in a new listener to be like make them feel like part of the club. So he'll be like not every time, but then he'll like explain, like this is why we say this.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, we after care, salami gets referenced and we're like gotta go listen to episode eight people, if you really want to hear what the fuck we're talking about, you got to go there.

Speaker 3:

Fair enough. All right, dara, I appreciate you being here. We'll do one more episode. We'll talk about Electro play and the class that you guys have started with pinking. And, yeah, make sure you guys tune in. Next week we will talk more about it. You can follow us on Facebook and Instagram, at come with us podcast. I'll follow us on Twitter at come with us pod. You can DM us there or you can email me or Beth and I. Come with us confessions at gmailcom. That's. Come with us confessions at gmailcom, dara, with all the socials for pinking.

Speaker 1:

We have pink kink podcast, comm, that is. You know, just go to the podcast website and then there's a whole bunch of links in there. But we also have a tick tock and I you know what. I'm not the social media person, so I am not the best person for this, but I can send you all of the links for it. We have. Let's see. I can tell you what we have. We have an Instagram, we have a Twitter.

Speaker 3:

I know you have a Twitter.

Speaker 1:

We have a Facebook group. We have each one of us has a fat, and then we also have the pink kink fat and and yeah, there's a link treat. We also have a pink kink boutique, which is where we have merch. It's on Etsy. We have pink kink Institute, which is what we're gonna be talking about in the next episode. We got a lot of stuff going on.

Speaker 3:

Oh yeah, you guys I don't know how you guys do this and juggle, you know, regular life and career and have time to actually, you know, go and play and be sexy at the time.

Speaker 1:

I don't either I.

Speaker 3:

Have to get into that. Next, I'd love to see your time management and what, how strict of a schedule y'all keep to what time management I Know what little sleep you get, or something, because there's, there's something that's not adding up.

Speaker 1:

I'll tell you I actually have the answer to that. I'll tell you in the next episode.

Speaker 3:

Okay, guys, thanks for being here again. Check us out on social media, check out the pink kink podcast. And Thanks for stopping by. We will see you next week.

Speaker 2:

Thanks for listening to the come with us podcast. Be sure to follow us on social media at come with us podcast and send in your questions, comments and confessions to come with us. Confessions at gmailcom. Until next time, keep it fun, flirty and naughty.

Podcast and Pink Kink
Introducing Femme Dom to Your Partner
Exploring Different Levels of Supportive Partners
Safe Words and Nonverbal Communication